attacked by a pack of snookis

Jenn: Have you seen @iamjackyblack's tweet joking about Snooki's due date coinciding with the Mayan's end-of-the-world prediction?


Bryce: Hah! Yeah, very clever.


Jenn: Wait, that's not quite accurate. Pregnancy is nine months. What's the actual gestation period for people, is it actually nine months? What is it in weeks? Preggos always talk about things in weeks. I've never been pregnant. Look that up.


Bryce: I think we should account that a Snooki might have a different gestation period.


Jenn: You're right! While we're at it, what if she spawns a litter?!


Bryce: Exactly. This is what the Mayans have foreseen.


Jenn: That'd be a good excuse for teenagers. You know? 

Mom: "Your curfew is 11! It's midnight and you didn't call." Son: "We were attacked by a pack of Snookis. Bob didn't make it!"

Bryce: Oh dumb, slow Bob.

stuff this week

Random toy squid found at the community garden.
Has nothing to do with stuff this week!

• Some cats are smart. Some cats are dumb. This one learned how to gamble.
• Snapshots of sacrifices and situations they encounter as photographers “in the field” for National Geographic.
• Swoon with me. Hey, Girl...The Garden Series.
• Spoiler: The dog is wearing a fat suit!
• John Fairfax was the most interesting man in the world. Really. 

"At 9, he settled a dispute with a pistol. At 13, he lit out for the Amazon jungle. At 20, he attempted suicide-by-jaguar. Afterward he was apprenticed to a pirate."

• I will never bow down to our saber-toothed-sausage overlords.
• So Google can't prove you're a delinquent, remove and turn off your web history.
• More proof Australia is trying to kill its people. This time with pinecones.
• In case you want to be frightened that you might witness someone break their neck, breath a sigh of relief, then pick up your jaw from the floor, and finally, feel inadequate. Watch this. (via brycepugh)
• Need moar cat? It'll make you squee! (via maddy)
• Meet Hank, the Virginia Cat Running for U.S. Senate. This week, his first attack ad is released! GASP!

ignore the guilt and do what's right

I have to write a letter to a neighbour, the strata, and the property manager that I really do not want to write. The letter will need to specifically outline that the unit above my condo is at fault for the water damage it has cause in my suite. Throughout the two month process of investigating its cause, I've learned more about my neighbours...and that's why I don't want to write the letter. I feel guilty, but I need to do what's right.